Five ex-professionals turned coaches emphasise that young athletes need to understand that failure and emotional resilience are key to成长ment and enjoyment in sport, challenging traditional emphasis on result-oriented performance.
Failure, not glory, was the theme that surfaced again and again when The Athletic asked five former professional athletes now coaching children what young players most need to understand about the mental side of sport.
The answers came from Travis Snider, Jay Jackson, Charlie Davis, Jeff Francoeur and Drew Stanton, and together they pointed to the same lesson: sport is not only about results. Snider, the former MLB outfielder, said children should be encouraged to separate their sense of self from what happens on the field, and to value being a good team-mate as much as being a good player. He said coaches and parents too often miss the chance to ask young athletes what they are actually feeling in the moment, whether that is embarrassment, shame, sadness or fear.
Snider described one young player who froze at the plate until he was helped to name the feeling behind his hesitation. Once the child identified fear and settled on taking a deep breath, he was able to swing more freely for the rest of the season. That kind of emotional literacy, Snider suggested, matters as much as mechanics.
Jackson, the former MLB pitcher, offered a simpler prescription: be positive and smile, even if it is forced at first. He said he played worse when pressure and negative thoughts took over, and that enjoyment made players more willing to work and improve. Davis, who played in Major League Soccer and for the United States men’s national team, framed the lesson differently, saying attitude and effort can outweigh talent. He said the athletes who stand out are the ones who stay composed whether the call goes their way or not.
Francoeur, another former MLB outfielder, said he prefers to talk about competing rather than winning. He pointed to a reassuring moment early in his career, when Atlanta manager Bobby Cox told him, “Frenchie, you are going to play every day for me this year.” That message, Francoeur said, lifted the fear that was weighing on him. Stanton, the former NFL quarterback, said young athletes often avoid mistakes because they fear short-term failure will define them, but growth comes from stepping beyond comfort. His team’s motto, he said, was “seek discomfort”.
The message from all five coaches lined up with broader sports psychology advice aimed at young athletes: missed performances, mistakes and pressure are not signs of weakness, but part of learning. Parents and coaches are often told to create environments that support confidence without feeding perfectionism, and to treat setbacks as feedback rather than proof of failure. In that sense, the former pros’ advice was strikingly consistent: the mental side of sport is not about never falling short, but about learning how to keep going when you do.
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