An expert argues that practical skills like patience, following instructions, and emotional regulation are key indicators of a child’s readiness for school, urging parents to focus on supporting their child’s emotional growth rather than solely academic achievements.
As the new school year approaches, parents often focus on whether a child can recite the alphabet, read or write. But Nina Oblak, a primary school teacher, says the more important signs of readiness are simpler and more practical: being able to wait, follow instructions, describe feelings and ask for help. That, she argues, matters more than early academic skills.
Oblak also warns against the habit of comparing children with one another. She says competition can start very early among adults, and that pressure is rarely helpful for a child. Research on differential parenting suggests that even small differences in how children are treated can shape emotional regulation, self-esteem and behaviour, which supports her view that fairness and calm expectations matter at home as well as in the classroom.
The point is not that every child begins school with the same knowledge. Some arrive already reading, while others are stronger at independence or listening carefully. Educational resources from PBS, Understood and school guidance materials in the United States all stress that patience, turn-taking and the ability to wait are learnable skills. They are also closely linked with self-control, communication and problem-solving, which are useful well beyond the first months of school.
Oblak says there is no single rule for whether a child should start school on time or wait a year. She suggests that a child’s motivation matters, but so does a parent’s instinct. If a parent feels deeply that a child is not yet ready, she says it is worth taking that concern seriously. For families, the wider message is clear: the goal is not to win a race, but to help a child enter school with confidence, curiosity and the ability to cope with everyday demands.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical judgment, advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
