Psychotherapists highlight enduring emotional impacts of physical punishment from childhood, revealing how societal norms obscure its damaging effects and urging a reevaluation of disciplinary practices.
Many adults who were smacked as children still carry the effects into later life, even if the punishment was once treated as ordinary. Psychotherapists say the fact that a practice was widespread in the 1970s and 1980s does not make it emotionally neutral, especially when it came from the very person a child relied on for comfort and protection. The issue is not only the physical act, but the fear, confusion and loss of trust it can create. According to the World Health Organization, corporal punishment is any punishment that uses physical force and is intended to cause pain or discomfort, and its consequences can reach well beyond childhood.
Alex Iga Golabek, a psychotherapist and founder of Ego Therapy, told Psychologies that the argument that “everyone did it then” misses the point because social norms do not erase a child’s individual experience. She said children can be left frightened and overwhelmed, while the adult still controls the situation and has other choices available. Golabek also argued that smacking is a form of physical violence and a misuse of parental power, because a child cannot walk away, defend themselves or choose a safer home. That imbalance, she said, is what can make the experience so difficult to process decades later.
For many children, the hardest part is not only the smack itself, but the mixed message that follows. They may be told the punishment was an act of love, that it was for their own good, or that they somehow caused it. Golabek said that can leave a child distrusting their own feelings rather than the adults around them, because depending on a parent for food, shelter and affection makes it dangerous to conclude that the parent is the source of harm. Giulia Davis, founder of Mycelia Therapy, told Psychologies that what often lingers most vividly is what happens afterwards: the silence, the expectation that life should continue as normal and the pressure on the child to behave as if nothing happened.
Psychologists say that is one reason the effects can persist long after the physical pain is forgotten. Rachel Needle explained that the body can retain a reaction to threat even when the adult mind understands what happened. Someone may intellectually know they are safe, yet still feel a rush of fear when a voice is raised or a sudden movement is made towards them. Research supports that concern. A study cited by the New England Journal of Medicine found that adults who reported harsh physical punishment in childhood faced a significantly higher risk of lifetime mental disorders, while UCL researchers found that children smacked at age three were more likely to experience poor mental health and behavioural problems into adolescence.
That does not mean every person who was smacked as a child will suffer lasting trauma, but experts say the risk rises when punishment was frightening, humiliating, unpredictable or part of a wider pattern of harsh treatment. A meta-analytic review of longitudinal studies found corporal punishment was linked with higher aggression, antisocial behaviour and mental health problems, and the American Academy of Pediatrics has also warned that physical punishment is associated with negative behavioural and psychological outcomes. The broader public-health picture is equally stark: the World Health Organization estimates that about 1.2 billion children aged 0-18 years are subjected to corporal punishment at home each year, with millions more exposed in schools. For parents and caregivers looking back, the message from specialists is clear: what may once have been dismissed as normal discipline can still leave deep emotional traces.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical judgment, advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
