As children face a mix of excitement and dread returning to school, experts emphasise early recognition and tailored interventions to address rising anxiety and prevent long-term issues.
As the new school year approaches, many children feel a mix of anticipation and nerves. For some, though, the return to the classroom brings something far more serious than first-day jitters: dread, tears, physical complaints and a firm refusal to go. Mental health organisations including the NHS, the Mental Health Foundation and Anxiety UK say that anxiety in children often shows up through stomachaches, clinginess, irritability, withdrawal and avoidance, particularly during transitions such as returning to school.
Dr. Lori Butterworth, a child and adolescent psychotherapist, argues that school refusal is rarely simple stubbornness. More often, she says, it is anxiety presenting itself in another form. The pattern is familiar: a child feels overwhelmed, staying home offers short-term relief and the brain quickly learns that avoiding school seems to work. Over time, that can make the next attempt to return even harder.
Butterworth says parents should aim to acknowledge the fear without reinforcing it. Children need calm reassurance that the feeling is real, but also a clear message that they are capable of getting through hard moments. That can mean helping a younger child through tears or working with a teenager who is irritable, isolated or dismissive about school but may in fact be worried about grades, friends, bullying, perfectionism or fitting in.
The advice from the NHS and Mental Health Foundation is broadly consistent: look for warning signs early, offer practical support and seek help when anxiety begins to disrupt daily life. The NHS says early intervention matters, while Anxiety UK notes that physical symptoms can be a key clue that distress is building. Butterworth recommends small, manageable steps rather than all-or-nothing thinking, such as getting dressed, arriving at school, staying for part of the day or reconnecting with one friend.
For children whose distress becomes persistent, evidence-based therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy, exposure-based approaches, acceptance and commitment therapy and parent-focused support programmes can help. Butterworth says parents should not try to carry the burden alone, and notes that some specialist centres offer support groups and practical guidance for families trying to navigate school-related anxiety.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical judgment, advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
