Psychologist Herbert Scheithauer urges parents to look for clusters of behavioural changes and understand the online spaces their children use.
Parents often try to limit how much time their children spend on screens, yet they may know far less about the online spaces their children actually inhabit. That gap matters, according to Herbert Scheithauer, the psychologist speaking to DIE ZEIT, because cyberbullying can unfold out of sight and still have serious effects. He said there is no single warning sign, but a child who becomes withdrawn, avoids school, shuns friends or digital media, sleeps badly or reacts anxiously to messages on social platforms may be struggling, especially if several of those changes appear at once. Scheithauer also cautioned that some of these signs could point to another threat altogether, including intimidation on the way to school.
Scheithauer has made a similar argument in previous interviews and public discussions, where he has said that online harassment became more visible during periods of remote learning and home schooling, when school life moved further into digital channels. In those settings, teachers often had fewer opportunities to notice what was happening between pupils, while students were left to navigate group chats, messaging apps and social platforms with little adult oversight. He has argued that digital media need to be treated as part of everyday classroom life rather than as an add-on, so that children learn how to behave responsibly online and schools are better equipped to respond when harassment starts.
The wider advice from Scheithauer is to pay attention to patterns rather than isolated incidents and to keep communication open. Guidance repeated in his interviews and seminars for parents and educators stresses that children affected by cyberbullying may feel shame and hide what is happening, so a calm response is more useful than immediate blame or punishment. For parents, that means taking behavioural changes seriously, asking direct but non-accusatory questions and seeking help early if the problem appears to be growing. The central message is simple: children’s digital lives are now part of their real lives, and adults need enough knowledge of them to step in when something goes wrong.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical judgment, advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
