Tantrums are usually a normal part of early childhood, but recognising the warning signs and responding calmly can help prevent them from escalating.
Tantrums are a familiar and often stressful part of early childhood, but experts say they are usually a normal stage of development rather than a sign of poor behaviour. According to Johns Hopkins Medicine and the Mayo Clinic, they most often appear in toddlers and young children who are overwhelmed, frustrated or unable to put strong feelings into words. The Indonesian article, drawing on clinical psychologist Annia Raja, explains that these outbursts can happen when a child’s nervous system is overloaded and can no longer cope with the emotional strain.
Parents may be more likely to see tantrums when a child is hungry, tired, overstimulated or deeply frustrated. Elizabeth Harstad, a developmental paediatrician at Boston Children’s Hospital, says this often reflects the gap between a child’s desire to be independent and their limited ability to communicate clearly. The behaviour commonly begins between 15 and 18 months, peaks around the age of two to three, and usually eases by about age five. The same article cites research showing that tantrums are very common in toddlers, affecting most children in that age range.
Recognising the first warning signs can help adults intervene before the emotional burst is fully under way. Those signs may include frowning, clenched fists, whining, increased fussiness, complaints about being tired or hungry, or covering the ears and shutting the eyes when instructions feel overwhelming. The Cleveland Clinic and Dartmouth Health Children’s both advise parents to watch for patterns and triggers, especially in busy settings or when routines are disrupted.
Once a tantrum appears to be building, experts recommend reducing demands and helping the child feel more secure. That can mean offering water, a snack or a short break, lowering yourself to the child’s eye level, and keeping directions simple. Johns Hopkins Medicine, the Mayo Clinic and Cleveland Clinic all advise parents not to give in to the tantrum, as that can reinforce the behaviour. They also suggest staying calm, offering limited choices and using distraction where appropriate. Harstad’s guidance, echoed by the Indonesian report, is that children often settle more quickly when an adult helps regulate the situation instead of reacting with panic or anger.
After the child has calmed down, a warm, reassuring response can help repair the moment and preserve the relationship. A hug, a soft tone and a brief conversation about what happened can help the child learn from the episode without feeling shamed. If a parent lost their temper, apologising can also be part of the repair. The article says families should seek advice from a paediatrician or child psychologist if tantrums are frequent, unusually intense, dangerous or continue beyond the age range normally associated with early childhood behaviour.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical judgment, advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
