The lost freedom making childhood more anxious

Psychologist Peter Gray argues that shrinking opportunities for unsupervised play, responsibility and exploration may be driving youth anxiety more than smartphones or social media.

Peter Gray argues that the growing anxiety among children is not simply a story about phones, social media or overprotective parents. In his new book, “Restoring Childhood: How to Set Kids Free in the Age of Anxiety”, the Boston College psychologist contends that the deeper problem is the steady loss of childhood independence. He says that children once spent far more time playing without adult supervision, exploring their neighbourhoods and taking on small responsibilities, and that those freedoms were central to healthy development.

Gray’s case draws on a broader body of commentary and research that has linked children’s worsening mental health to shrinking opportunities for self-directed play. A Journal of Pediatrics study reported by ScienceDaily in 2023 found that the rise in anxiety, depression and suicide among children and teenagers tracked with a long decline in independent activity away from adults. Similar summaries in other outlets, including LiveMint and KCLU, described the same line of research as an argument that children need freedom, not just protection, to build confidence and emotional resilience.

The book’s central argument is that childhood is meant to move gradually from dependence towards independence. Gray says play, experimentation and time away from adults help children learn social skills, solve problems and build a sense of agency. He also suggests that teenagers need real responsibilities, including part-time work and a path into the adult world, rather than being treated only as students under constant supervision.

To explain why this matters now, Gray points to a long shift in American family and school life. He argues that neighbourhood ties have weakened, children’s time is increasingly structured by organised activities and homework, and parents’ fears have risen alongside pressure to turn childhood into a preparation period for achievement. The result, he says, is that many children have fewer chances to contribute to family life, roam freely or make decisions without adult direction. That view overlaps with recent commentary in The Washington Post and Psychology Today, which also described a link between intensive parenting, reduced risk-taking and rising anxiety in children.

Gray also challenges the common view that smartphones are the main cause of the youth mental health crisis. He says the evidence points instead to changes in schooling, particularly the greater standardisation and testing pressure that followed education reforms such as Common Core in the United States. In his view, digital technology can be part of the solution rather than the problem if it gives children new ways to play, connect and learn independently. The broader prescription is not a return to the 1950s, but a rebalancing: more freedom in schools, in neighbourhoods and at home, so children can once again practise becoming capable on their own.