New play therapy approaches foster emotional growth and self-acceptance in preschool children

Stephanie Lock’s innovative use of play-based techniques and her children’s book champion the importance of self-acceptance and emotional resilience in early childhood development.

Play can be far more than a pastime for young children; for Stephanie Lock, it is often the starting point for communication, trust and emotional growth. The school counsellor, who has a master’s degree in school counselling from SUNY New Paltz, has spent nearly 15 years working mainly with preschool children, especially those with developmental, social and emotional needs. Her work combines individual and small-group counselling with play therapy elements and close coordination with teachers, therapists and parents.

Lock said her approach is built on meeting children at their current level rather than expecting them to perform beyond it. In practice, that may mean using a child’s favourite toys or activities to build language, turn-taking and interaction skills. A child drawn to bubbles, balls or cars might first join in with simple imitation before gradually moving towards phrases such as “my turn, your turn” or descriptive language. She also uses sign language and visual supports for children who are not yet verbal.

Her methods reflect broader guidance on play therapy, which WebMD describes as a way for children to express thoughts and feelings through play while developing coping strategies and more appropriate emotional expression. Research on play therapy in preschool settings has also found positive effects on emotional, behavioural and social development, reinforcing why clinicians and counsellors often treat play as a serious therapeutic tool rather than a distraction.

Lock has also turned those ideas into a book, “If Goldfish Were Bluebirds: A Story About Self-Acceptance”, which uses animal characters to explore comparison, self-worth and the value of difference. On her website and in book listings, the title is presented as a way to help readers, especially children, understand that being different does not mean being lesser. That message carries through her counselling philosophy as well: children should be supported in building new skills without being pushed to become someone else. For parents, Lock’s advice is simple and practical: acknowledge difficult feelings, focus on strengths, and create more opportunities for acceptance at home and in the wider community.